RECAP: New Girl 2x17 - "Parking Spot"

Things are still weird in apartment 4D for Jess and Nick since their epic kiss but they're trying to convince themselves that everything is totally normal between them. While this is a clear sign of denial from both parts, knowing Jess and Nick, it won't be long until the denial becomes too much and true feelings emerge. 

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The Apartment 4D Parking Spot:

   Schmidt is overjoyed that he has finally discovered, for the first time, the apartment 4D parking spot. The only catch is there is one spot and four roommates. So who gets the long desired spot? Jess suggests they share the spot but the boys disagree for obvious reasons. Sharing a parking spot sounds pretty unrealistic. Quickly, things between the roommates stop being polite, and start getting real. Jess plays the "girl" card, Winston plays the "race" card, Nick plays the "lazy drunk" card, and Schmidt plays the "deserves the spot" card. All cards, quite effective in their own right. The stand-off starts looking up when Winston sacrifices the spot for a sex window with his new girl Daisy. Down to three, Jess and Schmidt eliminate Nick from the running with judgmental stares and instead, make him the decider of who gets the spot.

    Jess takes the seduction approach and walks into Nick's room wearing a short skirt and only Nick's hoodie. Well played Jess, well played. Nick of course says she has the spot and Jess being...well...Jess, thanks him with a purple nurple! Ouch! Schmidt takes the best friend approach and is confident that Nick will give him the spot. Nick bursts his bubble when he informs him that he already gave the spot to Jess. Instantly in true Schmidt fashion, he is able to smell the sexual tension in the air and catches on that something has happened between Nick and Jess. Finally the truth comes out and they reveal that they have kissed. 

   Jess and Nick check up on Schmidt who has chosen to blow off some steam in his bedroom. He is pretty pissed about the whole situation because Nick didn't tell him right away about the kiss and is fearful that things will be different in the apartment. Jess tries to assure him that things have not changed but Schmidt brings up the fact that pre-kiss Jess didn't have the parking spot, post-kiss Jess did. Even better played Schmidt, even better played. Feeling guilty, Nick agrees to give Schmidt the parking spot, says he can't deal with this nonsense anymore and is leaving. Unhappy Jess catches Nick in the hallway and explains that they have to come up with a long term solution for the weirdness between them. After a strange "weird-off" in the hallway, Nick says he has come up with a long term solution...he's taking the spot!

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   With that, the three roommates are in a race to get their car in the spot first. Schmidt's car is stuck in the middle of a lot, Nick's car breaks down, and Jess has her car covered in...cats? Only in Jess's world. Resourceful Nick grabs a chair and promptly plants himself on the spot just as Schmidt pulls up. Determined to get the spot, Schmidt hits Nick with his car, and even more determined Jess hits Schmidt's car with hers. This has turned serious. Out of their cars and seat, the three have a sit-off on the parking spot; last one on the spot gets the spot. 

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   There is not much Schmidt won't do to get the parking space, including peeing his pants. Eww. Separated from Schmidt on the other side of the space, Jess and Nick finally admit that things have changed between them since their kiss. Frustrated, Nick says he regrets the kiss and would take it back if he could. Jess, feeling hurt, decides to walk away and gives up the parking spot. Nick goes after her up to the apartment and admits that it's not the kiss he regrets, but the aftereffects that he regrets. Schmidt joints them, pissed pants and all, and causes emotions to rise when he recites the "No Nail Oath" he, Nick, and Coach (episode 1) had signed when Jess moved in. According to the oath, if one roommate nails Jess, all roommates must nail her to make things right. Outraged, and rightfully so, Jess says there will be no nailing from anyone in the apartment. She stands her ground up until Schmidt explains that there can't be sexual tension and awkwardness among them in the apartment and that nailing her is the only way to make things right. She agrees and Schmidt goes in for the kiss. Big mistake. The two hate the kiss and just like that any hope of "Schmess" is out the window. But really, if you thought there was a possibility of Jess and Schmidt getting together...are you crazy? 

Condoms for Winston:

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   With the chance to have sex with Daisy, Winston races over to her apartment. Apparently the two of them have very different schedules and it is rare for them to have a window of opportunity. Just as things are about to get busy, Winston realizes he forgot a condom! Oh boy, how often has that happened for you? Awful. Regardless, Winston charges over to the local shop to pick up a box of condoms, no big deal, but when he reaches the register to pay he realizes he is wearing Daisy's sweatpants that read "YUM!" on the back of them. Not his best moment. Desperate for a condom, Winston begs the customers waiting on line to help a guy wanting to get laid out. Obviously he was kicked out of the store. 

   CeCe and that British guy she went on one date with decide to try and give dating each other another go. CeCe tries to explain that her friends are very easy going and drama free, but is interrupted by Winston banging at her door yelling for a condom. He barges in and demands a condom from CeCe's date who of course has one but refuses to give it to him. After running all around town in "YUM!" sweatpants, Winston finally discovers a condom stashed away in Jess's drawer. Success! With condom in hand, Winston has difficulty trying to navigate back to Daisy's apartment. Of course at this point, hours have gone by and that window of opportunity had closed a long time ago. Poor guy. 

   Winston returns to the apartment feeling completely defeated and tells the roommates that he just needs one win. Wanting to help him out, Jess, Schmidt and Nick give up the parking spot and agree that Winston should have it. Great news for Winston right? Well, the downside of the parking spot is their neighbors park way too close and the spot is so tight that it leaves Winston stranded between two cars. Uh guys?

   

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